I always have this reoccuring dream that I'm in New York. I say it's reoccuring but each dream is actually quite different, apart from that fact that I'm in New York.

Anyway. The New York in my dreams isn't the New York we know. It is, but it's weirdly combined with London and Prague. So, it's very European. But still New York. Yes, that's right. Don't argue with my dream logic.

The point is, I often dream that I live/study in/am travelling to/am visiting this version of New York. Previous dreams have involved me and various friends and family members staying in a large Ritz-like hotel in the city, which faced not only Big Ben, but Prague's astronomy clock. This also included a car crash of some sorts on the Golden Gate Bridge (I've never even been on the Golden Gate Bridge) and ended with me stealing minature version's of the astronomy clocks from the hotel, which were actually Time-Turners.

One of my dreams before that saw me studying in New York in a school that was a weird amalgamation of sixth form (the equivalent of going to college from age 16-18 here in the UK) and Hogwarts. Except none of us were really children and it was more like a university, though we weren't based anywhere specific except in the general New York area. I think the end of that dream involved me meeting up with my sister and her (rich) husband on his boat (though in my dream it gave off the impression of being a ship much like the Titanic), which could fly (?!). Not only that, but it was also filled with bubble bath.

Other dreams have involved me visiting the subway beneath this strange New York. Except the subway was a strange mix of modern railway tracks and old-fashioned mining tracks. The only thing that ever happens when I have this particular dream is that I start the journey on a normal subway-type train and come out the other end riding one of those mining caddies, wearing no clothes. There was once a variation of this dream where I was being chased around the subway station by a serial killer. I hid in a closet (?!) only to discover my dad was gay by peeking out at him making out with another man (?!!!).

But... this isn't really the point of my post. My point is that I had another of these dreams last night, where I was in this strange New York. I'm not sure what I was doing there, but I do know this: Eric, Bill, Godric, Pam and Jessica from True Blood were there. We were all on some weird kind of rescue mission to save a pop princess (ala Miley Cyrus, although she looked more like that girl out of High School Musical, Vanessa Hudgens?), which... no, I don't get it either.

At one point we were all in a dark forest... in New York. And Eric was riding a horse. Except it was a really long horse because Jessica and Godric were riding behind him, but with a lot of space between them. It was a stretch-horse or something. I'm not sure. The point is we all managed to rescue the pop princess and then we were invited to her concert (obviously). At this point I'd accepted how batshit insane the whole thing was, but I drew the line when the pop princess appeared on stage in a large gilded cage, much to Eric and Bill's delight.

I'm sure more insane things happened in this dream but the details started drifting as soon as I woke up. The only things I tend to remember about dreams such as this is the place and the people and the crazy-ass insane things that penetrate even the dreamiest of fogs.

Anyway, I thought I would share that with you all.
I finished Vicki Pettersson's latest book a few days ago and I'm still in awe, to be honest. I don't think I have any Pettersson fans on my list, but just in case: Spoilers. Majorrrrr. )

Now I've read the last of my new books, but it's okay because Thorn Queen is out today and Dreamfever is coming on the 18th. For now I'm re-reading Marr's Ink Exchange for a refresher before I move on to Fragile Eternity.
I've turned into a book junkie lately. Not that I don't already read a lot, but for the past two weeks I just haven't took my head out of a book. I have e-books littering my Desktop at work. I come home, I eat, and then I disappear with a paperback. And it's been so good. Sometimes I go through periods (only short periods, thankfully) when I don't read at it, mostly because I haven't managed to find a book to keep me interested. This happens sometimes. My attention span tends to shrink. Then I go through what I call my junkie periods, like now, when I devour one or two books a day simply because I can't stop reading. The only problem with these periods is that the good material eventually runs out. It doesn't help that I'm a little fussy about what I read; unlike my mum, I can't read just anything. Part of me wishes I could. So then I get this push-and-pull thing going on, especially when one of my favourite authors releases a new book, where part of me wants to just sit and read the whole thing right then and there, while another part of me needs to draw it out and make it last.

I've been re-reading old series for the past few weeks (as mentioned in my previous post). I read the previous Kim Harrison book and then White Witch, Black Curse, which I've had for a long time. I do love Harrison and I think she's at the top of her genre, but I'm starting to feel like her series is stretching a little bit too far. While the last couple of books have been revelations in themselves, I felt that the latest book didn't really build on the drama of the previous book all that well. But spoilers )

I made my way through Karen Chance's Cassandra Palmer series again (and Midnight Daughter) and finally, finally removed the fourth book from my shelf, dusted it off and cracked the spine.Curse the Dawn. Spoilers inside. )

I also re-read Karen Marie Moning's Fever series again. I think it's definitely up there in my top ten. I can't really describe what it is I love about it. I think it's because I genuinely like and care about the lead character, Mac, and I'm finding her transition into a "hero" believable. The whole series (well, thus far) is fascinating, dramatic, tense, gritty, dark, fun and unpredictable. I find myself almost unable to wait until the 18th for the next installment. The next book is going to lead to one of those push-and-pull things. Part of me will want to lock myself in my room and never come out until I've devoured the whole thing. The other part of me knows that this is the second to last book in the series (another thing I think works for this series; Moning already has it planned out and she knows what she wants to say with it) and it's a year's wait until the final book. I don't want it be over and I'm not really a fan of her Highlander series, so I know I should pace myself, even though I won't.

And this is the downside of being a book junkie. I don't know how long it's going to be until I find another series of books that drags me in so completely that I never want to leave my room. There's something almost addictive about the feeling of absolute satisfaction that you get when you reach the end of a mindblowing book.

Until then I have the new Vicki Pettersson book to read. I re-read the first three Zodiac books and didn't realise how much I'd forgotten about the third book. I think because so much happened in it and I only read it once (I usually re-read a whole series before the next book comes out, so the first two were drilled into my brain), only the big plot points stuck with me. But The Touch of Twilight is definitely evidence that Pettersson is getting more comfortable with her world and her characters, because it was of those books that started off so puzzling and twisted, and then the pieces finally, finally clicked in the end. I love this series because each book is a puzzle, a mystery, the outcome completely unknown and unexpected. I hope the fourth book is just as exciting and unpredictable.

Okay, a whole post about books. I think that pretty much says it all, folks. Despite what it mean seem, I do still have a life. Sort of. I'm out getting drunk at least once a week. I call this Socialising, though I don't know if conversing with a brick wall while intoxicated counts. No, I'm exaggerating. I haven't been drunk in a long time but I have been out, because I find that if I don't go out and interact with real human beings (work colleagues and family not included) at least once a week, I start to feel my brain seeping out of my ears. And plus, I love to dance. I'm also a dancing junkie. A dancing book junkie.

I've applied for a job in my office (I'm actually covering some of the duties of this particular position as a temp) and I have my interview on Wednesday. Eep. I'm quite nervous. There's a twenty-minute Excel test, and while I'm pretty spiffy on Excel, I'm paranoid that they're going to spring something on me that I totally don't know how to do despite my experience. But we shall see. If I get this job, my life will be so much easier. Temping is starting to make life a little difficult.
You know, the double standards in fandom really do annoy me. I've seen numerous comments scattered across the internet regarding Christian Kane's physique in the latest episode of Leverage and dear God, people. When did a six-pack become the default? It's laughable how many fangirls have slated the poor guy simply because he's not chiselled to within an inch of his life. The best comment I read was that Kane should know better, train better and work better, because he's friends with Jensen Ackles, who is fitness personified. What? Even I, who knows very little about Kane outside of the roles he plays, can tell you he works his ass off on that show. He does his own stunts, people. He is not, by any stretch of the imagination, a slouch. He is also not Jensen Ackles.

But... that's not the point of me bringing this up. The whole point is, if this had been said about a female character or actor, there would be outrage. As women in fandom, I've found we often celebrate the females on our TV screens and in our books who do not fit the "conventional" mold of what a woman should look like. And amen to that. But when did it become okay to place these body restrictions on the men in our fandoms? How is expecting a six-pack and well-defined muscles from men any different from expecting a flat stomach and big breasts from women?

It irritates me because body issues are not a gender thing. They're a people thing. And this image of the perfect form isn't to be blamed soley on men. It's not just their problem. It's not just their responsibility to work on tearing that image down. It's ours. We do this to ourselves and to each other.

I'm not going to say more than that, because I think I've pretty much said what I needed to. It's just... gah. It's not the first time I've seen this and it riles me sometimes.

Speaking of Leverage, I'm now caught up. And I also have my brother hooked. It's so cracky! And fun! And now I'm reading a lot of gen fic. Because I love the team and I think I could watch them work a con all day, every day.

It's weird, though, because I'm totally a raging 'shipper and there are always pairings I want to see or pairings I love to watch on-screen etc. But the 'shipper fics just aren't working for me. I don't know. Maybe because I'm totally confused. Because, erm, Hardison/Parker all the way, baby, but at the same time I would watch Hardision, Eliot and Parker bantering all day. I would say they're my OT3 but I'm not sure that's true. In theory, it's perfect. In reality I don't see Eliot/Parker working. But at the same time I do. Just not on-screen. And off-screen it has to be done just right and the few fics I've read where this is so has been team!fic or Hardison/Eliot/Parker, because they're too awesome for words.

So, yes, my fannish love is just that logical. Recommend me team!fic if you know of any, please.

My thoughts on True Blood 2.06. Spoilers. )

[personal profile] grrlnoir! I would just like you know to know that I've been working on your Chloe/Peter piece! Yes, I know, I'm months overdue, but there just wasn't a storyline there. And now I think I maybe able scratch one out. I'm hoping to get it to you soon, darling. And I shall be writing your letter shortly!

I have many books I need to catch up. I'm currently reading the new Kim Harrison book, White Witch, Black Curse. After that I need to re-read the last Karen Chance book so I can finally get to Curse the Dawn, which I've had on my shelf since March. I really need to re-read Karen Marie Moning's Faefever series, too, because I'm hazy on some of the details and the next installment is out next month. And then there's Vicki Petterson's next book, City of Souls, coming out tomorrow, and the continuation of Richelle Mead's Dark Swan series (Storm Born was one of my favourite reads of last year) coming out in a few weeks.

And all the while I'm jonsing to re-read The Black Jewels Trilogy. I've yet to tackle Tangled Webs and I want the stories and the characters to be fresh in my mind.

A little lower down on my to-read list is Charlaine Harris' new Sookie Stackhouse novel and Melissa Marr's Fragile Eternity. So, hmmm... yup, that should keep me going for a few weeks at least.
I went to the Doctor's on Friday and he said it's my digestion that's causing me problems. Basically, it's just not working. Well, not working right, anyway. So now I have tablets to settle my stomach. They seem to be working; my stomach isn't cramping after I eat anymore and my mouth doesn't taste nasty, either. Can't ask for more than that.

My date was nice. We went to the cinema to see The Hangover because I'd yet to see it. It was funny. I liked it because it was careful not to fall into that gross, slap-stick humour that films like this generally can't seem to resist doing.

We went for steak after. Luckily my taste buds had managed to ressurect themselves somewhat by this point and I was able to enjoy it. My date, on the other hand, didn't, mostly because he insisted on having his steak cooked medium-well-done, instead of medium-rare. Everyone in my town knows that ordering medium-well-done is the equivalent of ordering well-done here, i.e. burnt to a damn crisp. But I enjoyed mine and that, my friends, is all that mattered.

After that we went for a few drinks at the pub. I kicked his ass at pool. He kicked mine back. We talked a lot about books. He asked me if I'd read Twilight and I think I burst a blood vessel. Anyway. He's a sci-fi/fantasy geek like me, although, shockingly, he's read nothing by Neil Gaiman, Jim Butcher or Charles de Lint. They are now on his to-read list.

Overall, I got on with him very well. I'm just not sure there's any real chemistry there. He never really shifted out of the potential friend category. He even bought me fudge cake on Tuesday as a surprise because I had a craving for it, and nothing. I think I'm instinctively repelled by really nice guys because a part of me knows that I would probably break them into tiny little pieces. I don't handle these kinds of things very well.

But it was nice to actually go out and have some fun with a guy. I haven't dated for a long time, mostly because I find the whole thing a little awkward, so I'm pretty happy that it went as well as it did.

I won't say much about episode five of True Blood except that spoilers )

I started watching Leverage yesterday. I've been hearing good things about it and Christian Kane is on my list of actors I'd watch no matter what they're in. I'm liking it. It's very fun and funny. Spoilers for those who haven't started watching it yet. )

So I'm happy I'm liking this show. With most of my favourites on break, all I have is True Blood, so this is a nice little addition for the season.


Jul. 17th, 2009 02:43 pm
I'm going to the doctor's after work today. I've had enough of feeling draggy. I've had this ridiculously dry mouth for two weeks and ever since Monday it's gotten worse. I don't know if it's my mouth or my throat, but everything I eat or drink tastes foul. My whole mouth goes horribly dry barely a second after drinking something. Sometimes it feels like I have a giant hairball sat on my tongue. It's nasty. I can't even smoke cigarettes because they don't taste right. I've tried a new toothpaste and mouthwash and nothing. I'm cleaning my teeth four or five times a day just because I can't bear the taste anymore. Nothing is helping and I'm getting incredibly annoyed. I would like my taste buds back now, thanks. Especially since I have a date on Sunday and he's taking me for steak. I LOVE steak. Seriously, that is your way in with me. You want to make me all mushy and receptive to any favours you may want to ask me for, steak is the way to do it.

So yeah, I would like to be able to enjoy my steak. That's not too much to ask. And I would like to know why aliens have invaded my tongue.

I haven't really been up to a whole lot this week. My nausea was pretty constant until yesterday and I've been pretty tired. Even though I'm getting eight hours a night, I'm still coming home from work feeling laggy and exhausted. I don't know why. I can't even say it's because I'm run down, because I'm not. My routine hasn't even changed for the last few months. So I don't know what it is, but I'm tired of being stuck between ill and not-ill. Bleh.
So my Remix is in. Done. Finished. I did make the mistake of acting quite smug last week, assuming I was safe because my fic was almost complete and I still had three days to go. I think the migraine was payback for being a cocky bitch.

Anyway, I'm pretty happy with it. It didn't end the way I expected it to at all, but it was just one of those fics that knew where it wanted to end up and it was going to damn well end up there, thank you very much. Who am I to argue? I don't know if I said all I wanted to say with it, but I don't think stretching it out would have allowed me to, to be honest. Maybe a sequel would. A shift in perspective and circumstance or time. But right now, I think it's good as it is.

I, on the other hand, do not feel good at all. I think the migraine was a symptom rather than a cause, because I feel damn right squiffy. I missed work yesterday, so I made myself go today because I refuse to be floored by a migraine for three days straight. I refuse. Although to be fair my migraine settled into a bearable headache yesterday afternoon. It's just my stomach, which is now protesting against the lack of solid foods over the past three days. Eating has not been fun the last few days.

Ugh. Just talking about food right now is making me nauseas. Must move on.

How about this? True Blood. 4.04. Spoilers inside. )

Remix 7.

Jul. 10th, 2009 03:15 pm
My Remix fic is coming along nicely. I think. I won't know until it's finished. I know I want it to say something very specific, but I'm not sure what that is yet. I feel like I'm floundering when it comes to pinning down exactly what makes the characters tick and go boom. But not bad floundering. Good floundering. It's just strange because I've written these characters before and never really struggled with them.

Then again, I realised last night (and yes, I went to bed with plot bunnies in my head, thanks) that whenever I've written these characters in the past, I've only ever written from one specific POV, mostly because I relate to that character the most. But this fic is calling for a completely different POV, one that is really hard to fall into because there are just so many things that I don't like about this character. And it's easy enough to write about a character you don't like (but still find fascinating) when you're not, you know, IN THEIR BRAIN.

But I'm liking it. Sort of. It's a good challenge for me. And considering this is the first time in months that I've worked on anything at length, I'm not complaining.

I've been working on a Rogue/Wolverine fic for a while, too. I haven't really dedicated a whole lot of time to it, but I've been adding to it in fits and spurts for weeks. I don't know if it's really a 'shipper fic, though I originally intended for it to be. The main reason for starting the fic was that I wanted to explore a specific plot idea. Now usually a pairing is what will inspire a plot (or lack thereof) and I tend to work from there. I'm very much a pairings-centric gal in that that's what I will search for and read without question. Gen fic or multi-character fic I'll read only if it's recommended to me or I've stumbled across it by accident.

But I'm coming from a really awkward place writing this. I say that because I haven't written any X-Men fics AT ALL (except one really bad, really lame standalone years and years ago) so I'm not comfortable with the characters. And it doesn't help that the characters I'm writing seem to be an amalgamation of their various incarnations from the films and the comics, which, you know, is fine, except the relationship dynamics (and my own personal shipping preferences) differ between the two. X-Men the films? Wolverine and Rogue all the way. X-Men the comics? Rogue and Gambit. No question. And while I'd be more than happy to see Rogue and Gambit happen in the films, Wolverine and Rogue in the comics? Probably not so much. The fic I'm writing is really straddling the lines between film and comic, and pairing preferences aside, I don't know in which direction to take it in. Because it's going to get pretty dark. Not angsty, per se, just dark. And maybe a little creepy. But it's an ongoing project and probably won't be finished anytime soon.

I miss having a project. I should sign up for some more fic challenges. I may try a big bang this year, although that's probably pushing it.
I don't know if I'm going to be able to watch Vampire Diaries when it starts. The trailer killed me dead and now I think I may cry if I watched one episode.

You know, I've never read Twilight, mostly because I have no inclination to. I've heard all the talk, good and bad, but I've never cared enough to throw in my two cents. But lately I'm starting to really resent its existence. My Facebook is full of friends creaming their knickers over Edward Cullen because he's so incredibly hot and romantic, didn't you know? I think I've learned in the past few months that for lot of my friends attractive = automatically romantic. As long as he's hot, y'all.

Don't get me wrong. I don't bedgrudge them for enjoying the books. Different strokes for different folks. But it's when Hollywood uses these goddamn girls like tools that it pisses me off. Because they're feeding the problem. It's like, lets take this really scary, fucked-up story about death and dependency and obsession, and lets make it sparkly, literally. And no matter how the story changes or how messed up it gets, we'll just keep on making it pretty and plastic so they don't realise how sick and terrifying the whole entire thing actually is.

And yeah, it's hard to say that on the one hand, and then call myself an L.J. Smith fan on the other. Because Smith's work is plastic to a certain extent. It's YA and that calls for some kind of sugarcoating. But I wasn't even expecting anything as hardcore as True Blood or even Buffy when I first heard about Vampire Diaries coming to the small-screen. As long as the characters were likeable and loveable (because that's what Smith is best at, making me love her characters), I figured I could handle the cheesy-ass dialogue and bad storylines.

And then they totally messed with the characters. Not even a little bit. Not even subtlely. The fact that I didn't even recognise Bonnie in the trailer until someone pointed her out to me says a lot about the casting of this show. Bonnie is hard to miss. She's sassy and weird and worryingly-fascinated with dying young. The only way I was able to distinguish Elena from the rest of the brunette (again, eh?) brigade was because the trailer focused on her so intensely, as if to say, THIS IS YOUR HEROINE. YOU WILL LIKE HER.

I don't like the actor playing Stefan. I've seen him in two different shows in the past, a few scattered episodes here-and-there, and he's a one-note actor. And he's not even pretty.

Ian Somerhalder I adore. I do. It's his elf cheeks. But playing Damon? Can he do this? Can he really, really do this? Kudos on him if he can. But Damon's one of my favourite Smith characters and I want him done right.

The Salvatore Brothers are not the Cullen Brothers. They are not sparkly and they are not sixteen. I understand that the target audience is young (impressionable) girls who are just watching for the pretty, but this show is breaking my heart already because they clearly don't care about the female characters.

Can I watch it? Can I really, really watch it?

First Post.

Jul. 8th, 2009 10:34 am
I figured it was time I started using this journal, or at least playing around with it, anyway. I'll probably be using it quite often now, due to the fact that I can get on this but not LJ while I'm at work. Yay!

I really should add more people to this thing, otherwise this whole 'procrastinate-via-flist' plan isn't going to work.



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